Kids’ Jokes
Jokes are for everyone! Let kids have a laugh with these kid friendly jokes.
Nothing makes a parent happier than seeing his or her child laugh. Share these funny jokes for kids and best kids jokes with your mini-me. You may want to even try these corny dad jokes for a smirk and an eye-roll.
The Glass Slippers Don’t Help…
You Can Fly
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Rolling with Laughter
Very Slippery
Plant Pals
Signed, Sealed, Delivered
Write On
It’s a Phase
Frozen Accounts
Prehistoric Humor
Tardy Broom
Funny Fowl
Hand in Hand
Pickle Pun
Blast Off
All Ears
Sick Zombie
Q: Why didn't the zombie go to school?
A: He felt rotten!
Q: Why didn't the zombie go to school?
A: He felt rotten!
Vampire Fruit
Q: Which fruit is a vampire's favorite?
A: Neck-tarine!
Q: Which fruit is a vampire's favorite?
A: Neck-tarine!
Broken Pumpkin
Italian Ghosts
Q: What do Italian ghosts have for dinner?
A: Spook-hetti!
Q: What do Italian ghosts have for dinner?
A: Spook-hetti!
Dracula’s Dog
Q: What dog breed would Dracula love to have as a pet?
A: Blood hound!
Q: What dog breed would Dracula love to have as a pet?
A: Blood hound!
Cemetery Story
Q: Why is a cemetery a great place to write a story?
A: Because there are so many plots there!
Q: Why is a cemetery a great place to write a story?
A: Because there are so many plots there!
Ghost Makeup
Q: What do female ghosts use to do their makeup?
A: Vanishing Cream!
Q: What do female ghosts use to do their makeup?
A: Vanishing Cream!
Witch Hotel Guest
Q: What do witches ask for at hotels?
A: Broom service!
Q: What do witches ask for at hotels?
A: Broom service!
Interrupting Ghost
Q: What did the mummy ghost say to the noisy young ghost who kept interrupting?
A: "Spook when you're spooken to."
Q: What did the mummy ghost say to the noisy young ghost who kept interrupting?
A: "Spook when you're spooken to."
Ghost Glasses
Q: What do ghosts wear when their eyesight gets blurred?
A: Spooktacles
Q: What do ghosts wear when their eyesight gets blurred?
A: Spooktacles
Vampire Holiday
Q: What would be the national holiday for a nation of vampires?
A: Fangs-giving!
Q: What would be the national holiday for a nation of vampires?
A: Fangs-giving!
Skeleton Music
Q: What is a skeleton's favorite musical instrument?
A: A Trombone!
Q: What is a skeleton's favorite musical instrument?
A: A Trombone!
Mummy Music
Q: What genre of music does a mummy like the best?
A: Wrap!
Q: What genre of music does a mummy like the best?
A: Wrap!
Spooky Ghost Parents
Q: What does a ghost call his mom and dad?
A: His transparents.
Q: What does a ghost call his mom and dad?
A: His transparents.
Locked Cemetery
Q: How do you get inside a locked cemetery at night?
A: Use a Skeleton Key to unlock the gates!
Q: How do you get inside a locked cemetery at night?
A: Use a Skeleton Key to unlock the gates!
Witch for Lunch
Q: What is the name of the witch who lives in the desert?
A: Sand-witch!
Q: What is the name of the witch who lives in the desert?
A: Sand-witch!
Panda Ghost
Q: What does a panda ghost eat?
A: Bam-BOO!
Q: What does a panda ghost eat?
A: Bam-BOO!
Halloween Recess
Q: What is a recess at a mortuary called?
A:Â A Coffin Break!
Q: What is a recess at a mortuary called?
A:Â A Coffin Break!
Ghosts on Vacation
Boo-tiful Hair
At Least She Has a Good Sun Hat!
That Candy is for the Birds
For Young Padawans
Skeleton Chase
Skeleton Weatherman
Superman’s costume
Pumpkin Pedestrians
Mickey’s Career Change
Lost Balloons Never Bothered Her Anyway
I Don’t Boo-lieve You
Cracking Up
Prank: Trap the Mouse
Prank: Help Them Learn a New Language
Prank: Underwear Switch-a-Roo
Prank: Oh No – You Cracked Your Phone!
Prank: Block the Shampoo Bottle
Prank: Power Down the Remotes
Prank: Turn Tap Water Weird Colors
Lovable Monsters
I’ll Call You
A Little Bird Whispered
Q. What do you call two birds in love?
A. Tweet-hearts!
Q. What do you call two birds in love?
A. Tweet-hearts!
Two Ships Passing in the Night
Q. What did the little boat say to the yacht?
A. Can I interest you in a little row-mance?
Q. What did the little boat say to the yacht?
A. Can I interest you in a little row-mance?
Musical Mayhem
When my grandson Gavin was 4 years old, he loved to “play” the piano. Once, when he was done, we forgot to close the lid to the keys. As we walked by later he said, “I better close the piano or the boogeyman will play some scary songs.”
A Fishing Fiasco
My son Ryan was 2 years old when his daddy took him out to the little trout pond we built in our backyard. His dad spent a few minutes showing Ryan how to throw the line in the water to catch a fish. Then he said, “OK, son, throw it in.” Ryan threw the entire pole into the water.
A Ribbiting Story
When I was teaching kindergarten and had a cold, I would often get laryngitis with it. One day a student asked me, “Do you have a frog in your nose?”
When I was teaching kindergarten and had a cold, I would often get laryngitis with it. One day a student asked me, “Do you have a frog in your nose?”
Golden Years
At his birthday party, my grandson said, “I love you,” and I replied, “I love you, too.” Then he said, “I wish you were 5 years old like me so you would be around longer.”
Hay, Oats and Fairy Dust
Our 4-year-old granddaughter, Ivy, has been taking riding lessons for over a year. One day during breakfast, she was talking with her mom about horseshoes.
Ivy’s mom said the person trained to shoe a horse is called a farrier. “Are they little people with wings?” Ivy asked.
Where Eggs Come From
When my daughter, Brooxie, was 5 years old, she’d stay with my husband’s parents while we were at work. One day Brooxie was helping Papaw gather eggs.
While putting the eggs into the basket she was carrying, she asked, “Papaw, where do these eggs come from?” Papaw then explained in detail the delicate process of making an egg. Brooxie put her hands on her hips and exclaimed, “Papaw, I don’t eat anything that comes out of a chicken!” And for many years, she didn’t.
Breads and Braids
Head lice had been detected on a child in the local school, and the teacher told the girls in his class to wear their hair in a bun to discourage the lice.
My grandson, 6-year-old Ryan, asked the teacher, “A hot dog bun or a hamburger bun?”
Baby on Board
My mother was babysitting my son, Lance, and they were watching a foal being born on 
a farm animal show on TV.
With wide-eyed innocence, 3-year-old Lance looked at my mother and said, “Nana, how 
did it get in there?” He’s almost 20 now, and someday I’ll have to tell the story at his wedding.
Pick Up Sticks
We took our 3-year-old grand-son, Sawyer, and his parents to 
a Chinese restaurant. While we enjoyed our wonton soup and other dishes, Sawyer and his dad wanted to eat their meals with chopsticks.
Sawyer was having difficulty getting the rice between the sticks and frantically said, “I can’t get anything on these tweezers!”
Taste and See
Two 10-year-old boys from the mountains were riding a train to the city for the first time.
For a snack, the attendant gave them bananas. The boys had never eaten such a fruit. Billy started to eat his banana, and the train entered a tunnel. He yelled, “Johnny, don’t eat it! 
I took two bites and went blind!”
Two by Two
A few years back, Criseyda, my granddaughter, was visiting me. After a while, the house became very quiet.
Calling out, I said, “Criseyda, where are you?” Her answer: “Mimi, I’m here with the man who has two of everything!” I found her playing with my primitive Noah’s Ark and all the sets of animals. Sure enough, he has two of everything!