35 Funny Friendship Quotes to Share with Your Friends

What are friends for? Laughing at your jokes, of course. Get your pals giggling with these funny friendship quotes.

If your friend jumped off a cliff, would you do it too? If it was in a barrel of laughs, you might as well. Your friends are the people who get you—and who get your jokes, even if they’re corny. Need some ideas? Check out these funny movie quotes and funny marriage quotes to keep your friends in stitches. And since you’re already giggling, take a look at the funniest quotes of all time. Then settle in with our list of funny friendship quotes. Have a laugh, then share them with your bestie. Might as well share some best friend quotes while you’re at it.

1. “A good friend will always stab you in the front.” —Oscar Wilde

2. “Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.” —Oprah Winfrey

3. “It takes your enemy and your friend, working together, to hurt you to the heart: the one to slander you and the other to get the news to you.” —Mark Twain

4. “I do not want people to be very agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them a great deal.” —Jane Austen

5. “There is nothing better than a friend, unless it’s a friend with chocolate.” —Linda Grayson

Linda Grayson Funny Friendship Quoterd.com, Getty Images

6. “Don’t look at me in that tone of voice.” —Dorothy Parker

7. “You find out who your real friends are when you’re involved in a scandal.” —Elizabeth Taylor

8. “There is nothing like puking with somebody to make you into old friends.” —Sylvia Plath

9. “Men kick friendship around like a football, but it doesn’t seem to crack. Women treat it like glass, and it goes to pieces.” —Anne Morrow Lindbergh

10. “A messy house is a must—it separates your true friends from other friends. Real friends are there to visit you not your house!” —Jennifer Wilson

If you’re laughing right now, you’ll double over at these funny friend memes you’ll want to send to your BFF ASAP.

11. “One loyal friend is worth ten thousand relatives.” —Euripides

12. “A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows you are slightly cracked.” —Bernard Meltzer

Bernard Meltzer Funny Friendship Quoterd.com, Getty Images

13. “Never contract friendship with a man that is not better than thyself.” —Confucius

14. “It’s the friends you can call up at 4 a.m. that matter.” —Marlene Dietrich

15. “One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim.” —George Carlin

If you want to get your bestie a little something to show how much you care, check out these best friend gifts for every type of friend.

16. “Eros will have naked bodies; friendship naked personalities.” —C. S. Lewis

17. “When you’re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, ‘Damn, that was fun.'” —Groucho Marx

18. “She discovered with great delight that one does not love one’s children just because they are one’s children but because of the friendship formed while raising them.” —Gabriel García Márquez

19. “Everyone is a complicated human being, and everyone is strong and weak and funny and scared.” —Laverne Cox

20. “Fan the sinking flame of hilarity with the wing of friendship; and pass the rosy wine.” —Charles Dickens

If your best friend is also your partner, you’ll want to check out these relationship quotes that celebrate love.

21. “To like and dislike the same things, that is what makes a solid friendship.” —Sallust

22. “Marriage: a friendship recognized by the police.” —Robert Louis Stevenson

23. “Friendship is a wildly underrated medication.” —Anna Deavere Smith

These best friend captions for Instagram are perfect for the next time you snap a pic of you two.

Anna Deveare Smith Funny Friendship Quoterd.com, Getty Images

24. “She was the kind of person who never gave you enough time to miss her.” —Zadie Smith

25. “Friendship is being there when someone’s feeling low and not being afraid to kick them.” —Randy K. Milholland

26. “Best friend isn’t a person; it’s a tier.” —Mindy Kaling

27. “Let us be elegant or die!” —Louisa May Alcott

28. “Love is friendship that has caught fire.” —Ann Landers

29. “It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn’t use long, difficult words but rather short, easy words like ‘What about lunch?'” —A. A. Milne

If you’re enjoying these, give these funny sayings a go too.

30. “All you need to do to be my friend is like me.” —Taylor Swift

31. “Every man should have a fair-sized cemetery in which to bury the faults of his friends.” —Henry Brooks Adams

32. “I’ll stick to finding the funny in the ordinary because my life is pretty ordinary and so are the lives of my friends—and my friends are hilarious.” —Issa Rae

33. “A friend is someone who knows all about you and loves you just the same.” —Elbert Hubbard

34. “No man who has once heartily and wholly laughed can be altogether depraved.” —Thomas Carlyle

35. “Nothing is more dangerous than a friend without discretion; even a prudent enemy is preferable.” —La Fontaine

If these funny friendship quotes are making you miss your bestie, send over some of these miss you quotes that really capture the longing.